Ribbon-Winning Speech on Why You Need A Mentor

Photo of President Sushil of Harrovians presenting ribbons to speaker, evaluator and topics speaker, Angela Lansbury.

On Monday January 29th at Harrovian Speakers' Club in Edgware, Middlesex, UK, I won three ribbons, for table best table topics, best evaluator, and best speaker.

Here's my speech on mentoring:

Why You Need A Mentor
I'm your mentoring organizer. Hands up if you are a mentor. Hands up if you are a mentee. Hands up if you are neither. I'm  mentoring organizer. it should be easy. In theory I could toss a dice in the air and match you all up randomly. Or I could run along pairing you up. Numbers one and two in the line mentor each other. Two and three. And so on. Job done.

It's not as easy as that. I belong to two clubs in London and one in Singapore and I've been to more than 50 clubs in Singapore, when I'm there I visit a club every night. They all have problems matching people up and getting them to meet each other. Can anybody guess or suggest why?

No commitment
Audience member Indra replied: People don't want to commit?

Yes!

Today, at the start of this meeting, I said to Kamlesh, "I'm your mentor," - which we had agreed the previous meeting.
But he said, "Well, um, I don't really need a mentor. I haven't got my manual yet. And I haven't prepared a speech."

So we have mentees who don't want to be mentored. If you assign a mentor, they all say, "No. I want to be mentored by the President." So I phone up the president, Sushil.

Too Busy
He says, "But I already have five mentees. Besides, I'm busy running the club. And I have a job to do. And next week I'm off travelling on business to America."

It's like arranging marriages, being a marriage counsellor, and arranging divorces! I've got six singletons and a man with four wives.

Being a mentor also has its problems. I was a mentee to somebody. He didn't have a speech title. He couldn't think of a topic. He didn't have anything to say. After I spent half an hour talking him through a speech, correcting a speech, he decided to change topic. Then not to give a speech. Then to leave the club.

However, it can be very rewarding.
I had a mentee at Harrovians' sister club, the current club president (Martin Doe). His speech was scheduled and by the time he had time to do it, I was off to Singapore. I said, email it to me. He emailed it, it arrived when I reached Singapore.  I corrected. He emailed, I like your suggestions. Now I want you to see me perform it."
I replied, "I'm in Singapore. Send me a video."
"How do I do that? I don't have a video camera."
"Use your phone. Phones take videos. A selfie video."

He sent it.
But it wouldn't go through. Too big.
So we tried drop box. I had to get a password and sign up.
He had to get a password and sign up.

It wouldn't send. He was on on Microsoft word. I was on a Macbook. My husband helped. His wife helped. We must have spent a day.

Eventually, I got a video full of breaks, like a 1910 film. However, by reading the script I'd been sent, I could work out the words matching his actions, and could suggest gestures to match, change of speed and so on.
Finally, he gave his speech and won a ribbon!
I was very proud of him. Even more proud of myself.
I thought it was my help which made all the difference.
He very politely agreed.

I needed to mentor somebody for their first three speeches to complete task number 8? in the Competent leader manual.

In Singapore I went to a different club every night trying to find a mentee. The President of Club A said he'd find a mentor. Nothing happened.

I went to a college Club. I found a menteee, mentored three speeches. Job done.

Back in London, PING! I get an email. 'I am Myanmar in Singapore. My president say you want to mentor me. Here my first my speech."

I don't have time. She has three mistakes in the first three sentences - and that's just the covering note!  So I tell her to run the speech through Grammarly.
Over coffee I suggest putting it in time order.
Later that day she comes back.
PING. She has run it through Grammarly. She urgently wants it checked for her speech tonight.
I read it and suggest she ends with a call to action, tell the members they can ask her about her job in the interval and they ever need advice on (statistics) they should come to her because she's the expert.

Next day I get another email. PING. Her speech was a great success. People particularly liked the ending.
I am so happy for her. I am so proud of her. And myself.

Mentors Helped
So mentees are helping mentors as well as being helped. You can also do mutual mentoring. My first mentor was Indra, who encouraged me to use props.

How Mentoring Helps Members And Clubs
Despite the problems, the marriage of mentors to mentees works. Mentoring helps the club provide a professional and friendly atmosphere with teamwork.
That's why you need a mentor, or to be a mentor. It's rewarding for everybody.
So, as soon as you join the club, contact the committee for a mentor. Harrovians' President Sushil meets new members and finds out their goals and needs and matches them to a suitable mentor. I keep a list and forward it to committee members Amparo and Sarda.

Are you going to sign up to be a mentor or mentee? Please applaud and shout Yes! Yes! Yes!

Angela Lansbury
Member of Harrovian Speaker, UK. Mentoring co-ordination.
Member of HOD Speakers. Secretary.
Member of Braddell Heights Advanced Speakers' Club, Singapore. VPPR.
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Feedback I gave to Dennis of HOD, plus general notes on How To Be A Toastmaster

I was very impressed that you (Dennis) took a day off work to prepare. 

Another option is to do your phoning around and emailing the previous weekend.  Maybe tell all members by email that speakers must contact their mentor to rehearse a week in advance and have their speech title and project numbers on the programme a week in advance. Have a backup speaker who would otherwise be on the agenda the following week, so no speaker has to prepare a speech at the last moment to fill in for a dropout. Ensure that people who need to do speeches for completing manuals, work presentations, weddings, are given priority, yet nobody is constantly pushed out to make way for VIPs.

You were very smooth and confident, calm and excellent as a toastmaster. I particularly liked the informative and positive sentences (which I noted at the time on the back of the programme):

'Sign the register so that in the case of an emergency (such as fire) we can know who came to the meeting so we can do a count.’ Very useful explaining that, because otherwise, people think only newcomers need to sign.

'I don’t expect you to run as fast as Usain Bolt.’ Amusing,attention-gettingg.

'We want to see your warmth.’ Warm.

'Toastmasters is a family.’ Positive.

'I'd like to introduce …’ Positive.

What else could you add to enhance your role if you do it again? (Watch others on video and at later meetings, noticing what you like and don’t like.)

I was Toastmaster twice in Singapore on the two nights before I flew home this week. From my two experiences plus yours I have compiled these notes 

You explained the location of toilets. Good. You asked phones switched to silent. 

Appoint Sergeant at Arms to sit near projector to help and move tables. 

Meeter and greeter should stay by door to give agenda to latecomers, smile and show them an empty chair.

VIP visitors such as area director can be put on the agenda and welcomed. 

GIFTS

(Rich in house clubs such as financial companies print a pen and notebook company colours with company name and wrap them in seasonal paper and present them to visiting Toastmasters or other VIPs doing roles such General Evaluator. Smaller clubs on small budgets (or clubs with no budget but a generous member or area governor or Toastmaster from another club) go to Poundshop and buy a dozen cheap pencils or notebooks and present one gift to each person who does a topic, answers a quiz question, travels miles across the city to be an evaluator, listing Area Governor doing the twice yearly inspection or GE etc.) Leftover chocolates from Xmas, or the wrapped in foil chocolate biscuit from the break time food would work just as well.

SAA should ensure milk and food is being organized - avoid last minute panic which stresses the President and everybody in the room. Fruit such as washed grapes or bananas should be provided because many people are on diets or should be on diets and it’s daft to have a speech at every meeting telling Toastmasters to eat more fruit and less sugar and then serve them only sugared cereal biscuits. Provide water for anybody speaking over ten minutes such as a half hour or full hour presentation. Keep the water away from paperwork and electrics.

Check speakers with slides have the needed adapter, and/or printouts of slides, and/or slides on a thumb drive, and/or another member with a laptop which does work with the club adapters and/or the slides in Word and not Apple’s Keynote if the other person has a non-apple /Android phone.

SPEAKING AND VOTING LIST

Sergeant at Arms to LIST On Board (or project on screen from a laptop)

1 Introductions: Say (eg your name, your club, your job, your hobby (For the benefit of those who don’t understand, forget, or latecomers).

2 Topic Speaker's name, one word subject, time (to help voting) and so you don’t forget voting

3 Prepared Speaker, speech title, time

4 Evaluator, speech title, time

VOICE CHECKS

Ask timer and speakers and evaluators to do a sound check to be sure people in the back row can hear the speaker.

Clear floor of bags and papers before taking photo. 

Ensure the photographer is included in one of the photos. 

MANUALS

1 Write in advance to speakers reminding them to bring their manuals. (Add this to the agenda emailed in advance.)

MATCH SPEAKERS AND EVALUATORS

Match advanced speakers with advanced evaluators. Check the speaker is happy with the evaluator. Some speakers would like a change of evaluator for a new viewpoint or more detailed feedback. Other speakers might prefer continuity so the evaluator can comment on how the speaker has improved.

MENTORS

Mention the speaker’s mentor to give the mentor credit and encourage newcomers to ask for a mentor.

Brief evaluators to start evaluations and and end evaluations with a compliment and sandwich by giving one useful suggestion on how to improve their subject matter or presentation. (They should avoid giving only praise and no helpful suggestions - if they can’t think of one they can ask around during the interval). Also try to prevent evaluators giving an entirely damning evolution about not fulfilling the objectives which depresses the speaker and the audience. They should say how much the speaker would benefit by building on their existing speech to enhance it. Pathways requires you to repeat your first speech using the the suggested enhancements - so the evaluator has to give suggestions, and the speaker has to repeat the speech.

PHOTO NEW MEMBER AT MEETING START WITH THEIR MENTOR

Check evaluators know where to find objectives in the manual. Ask evaluators to sign and return speakers’ manuals to speakers. Remind evaluators to bring manuals so that they can get credit in the leadership manual for evaluating.  Mike Freedman suggested that an advanced speaker should try to do an Advanced project rather than constantly reporting the basic manual, to develop both speaker and evaluator and impress guests and provide variety in the meeting.  Photo copy the bass manual and one or two of the advanced manuals so that if an evaluator and speaker don’t have manuals you can email or whats ap the objectives and the evaluation sheet. 

Evaluators can make notes on their phones and read back from their phones - using less paper and making less litter to clear up at the end of the evening.

Explain the manuals to guests.

TOASTMASTERS INTERNATIONAL HISTORY & BENEFITS

Give a brief history of Toastmasters ‘for the benefit of visitors’. Numbers of clubs in the UK and worldwide, members, etc (Keep these facts on a card or better still memorise them. Express surprise and amazement at the opportunities for friendship when travelling or on holiday. 

Explain to visitors the hand shaking, applause, and terms of address. 

HOD President Martin Doe says - these are handy to practice because you will find it easier to remember these Rules of Procedure (at a rotary club) or at a wedding or other event.

SEATING & BRIEFING TOASTMASTER & PRESIDENT

SEATING AND BRIEFING

List topics evaluator on the programme. Ensure topics master knows the topics evaluator so they don’t ask the topic evaluator to speak and then get rejected.

SEATING & BRIEFING LATECOMER EVALUATORS

If an evaluator for speaker 2 is late, you risk a situation when speaker 2 runs across the room to hand a manual to evaluator 2 and whisper or chat loudly to valuator 2 about which project, whilst speaker one is trying to speak and hold audience attention.

Ensure each speaker who has no evaluator sits near the door by an empty chair and has instructions written on a note to hand to the late evaluator. If necessary, tell the whole audience that you want them to hand each other notes written in capital letters, and not talk during project speeches nor any other stage presentation.

GROUP PHOTO

Add group photo to the agenda. Ideally organise the photo at end of first half because some people leave early, and/or during the interval. You as Toastmaster or / VPE ? President can use the photo as an excuse to write to the guests and say hope they enjoyed the meeting and here’s a photo of the group with you in such and such a row. Get the photographer to email the photo while at the meeting so it can go straight up onto Facebook next day.

Ask people to come forward and sit in the front row.

CHAIRS

Ensure a spare chair is near the door so latecomers don’t feel embarrassed and don’t lurk visibly at the door distracting speakers and disrupting the speakers by walking across the room to a distant empty chair.

Call people back five minutes before you need them after the interval to allow them time to rush to the toilets (of which there are only two or three toilets between 25 guests)

In the interval ensure that guests are introduced to somebody and not left standing alone.

Before the break and/or at the end of the meeting ask guests what they thought of the meeting and if they are likely to want to join a Toastmasters club.

Give the names of the people who did topics (write the names on the flipchart or project onto the screen and give their subject in one word eg, holidays, toastmasters, cats, Calcutta.

ENTHUSIASTIC INTRODUCTIONS

Find one word to introduce each person - write it on the programme (agenda). If you don’t have time or don’t know anything, make up an alliterative compliment to make the speaker and audience laugh and smile - you can invent these in advance eg Marvellous Martin, ‘I am the delightful, dedicated Dennis, Toastmaster of the Day’, Here is jolly Justin, please welcome  Super Sina, Marvellous Manish, Amazing Michael/ Marvellous Michael, Angelic Angela Lansbury, Delightful Denise, Special Sonia, Spanish Sonia, Able Angela Hook, (with two members called Angela, please add the surname, Generous Gill, - you could even email people in advance and ask if there’s one word which sums them up,   

VIDEOS & SLIDES

Check people using videos or slides have set them up in advance to prevent delays.  

REMOVING PAPERS FROM LECTERN 

Remove papers left behind by speakers from the lectern because that muddles you and others, sends bits of paper flying when you grab one and others tumble, and people go home without vital information such as their speech notes.

REMOVING VOTING SLIPS AND TALLIES

Remove any note showing numbers of votes. Good practice at club level so you remember at Toastmasters and other public contests. In contests I have experienced major disruption three times: an irate ‘loser’ attacking the judges, blaming a fellow contestant, heckling the winner at the closing ceremony, later writing to demand that the chief judge be prevented from judging again and asking judge to resign from Toastmasters. ( That’s not counting events where I was not present: 

a wrong announcements at a Toastmasters Contest which we all heard about it at an Area Club Officer Training - 

plus ongoing repercussions for a Toastmaster making the wrong announcement at a Miss World contest.) 

Put the voting count in your pocket and throw it away elsewhere. Don’t leave it on the lectern, nor in the bin.

At club meetings a speaker finding they had only one vote or none could be demoralised and depressed. You don’t have to have names on the ballot sheet or voting count to know that if nobody voted for you, your best friend or wife or President voted for somebody else or didn’t bother to vote at all so you missed out on a ribbon or lost a contest, or to feel that nobody in the club likes you.

ANNOUNCEMENTS

Ask around at break time if anybody wants to make announcements.

End with clear announcement of the date of the next meeting for visitors to put in their diaries. 

Allow time for announcements. Check in advance if the President or visiting area director or member of another club has an announcement so instead of last minutes discussion across the room and exchanges with you like an afterthought, they can be welcomed on stage.

CLOSING ADDRESS

Don’t just mutter, ‘That’s it. 'bye'. End with a cheer or round of applause!

Angela Lansbury CL ACG

annalondon8@gmail.com

Author, travel writer, photographer, speaker.

Follow me on Facebook, blogger.com and YouTube.

http://travelwithangelalansbury.blogspot.co.uk

HALLOWEEN AT HARROVIANS

It was a brilliant themed meeting.

LESSONS LEARNED

Maybe add to the next committee meeting to discuss

1 Mentoring - My sessión did not allow every group to give feedback. Maybe we could send around a request for feedback.

2 I could have brought a prop or piece of clothing if I’d thought about it. Next year we could suggest everybody wears something related to Halloween or filing that black or white or orange, anywhere, or around the neck and give everybody an orange paper napkin to hold or wear, or a piece of orange ribbon. 

Regarding newcomers doing roles. I think it would help them if we did one of these things.

3 GRAMMARIAN

 Include on the programme sheet for TME to read out and instruction such as:

a)The Grammarian does three things: gives us the word of the written on the clipboard by the SAA; gives one hint on grammar; 

b) Provide a dictionary and/grammar book for the grammarian to use.

4 TIMER

 A hint to the timer: The Timer demonstrates the lights, tells us the time for speeches and evaluations and roles, and says why time is important. 

( In the club box: Three quotations about time printed for the timer to choose one read and hold it up for pin it on the clipboard.

5 TOPICS MASTER

The topics master chooses one experienced member and then offers opportunities to two guests or members not on the programme a chance to speak. 

(A box of items or quotations for the topics master. Or a series of cards, say 5

The books which helped you in your job: add best, worst, memorable,

your best advice on choosing a career; add best, worst, memorable

the best company you have worked for; add second best, worst, memorable, 

 the best service you’ve had from a shop, restaurant or business; add equally good, a disaster, I wish I’d said ...

Your best tip on cooking, cleaning or gardening. add best, worst, I wish I’d said.

It was a great meeting. Keep up the good work. Well done and thanks to President Sushil, and Indra and Amparo for the food and decorations and decor.

To see the date of the next meeting go to

www.harrovians.org
to find a speakers club worldwide go to
https://www.toastmasters.org/find-a-club

Author
Angela Lansbury, speaker and author, travel writer and photographer.
www.travelwithangelalansbury.blogspot.co.uk
www.luxurytravelforless.co.uk

HOW TO RUN A MENTORING SYSTEM IN A CLUB

ADVANTAGES OF MENTORS

HISTORY OF MENTORS

The name Mentor comes from a Greek man named Mentor.

 When Odysseus went of to fight the Trojan war, he appointed his friend Mentor to be tutor and adviser to the Son of Odysseus.

PLAN CLUB MENTORING

You know the saying, you don’t plan to fail, you fail to plan. 

A club should plan to copy the action of Odysseus, and appointing a mentor to every new member. 

Why are mentors necessary? Newcomers are nervous and need encouragement. Meetings are often run by people who make mistakes because they have not been briefed to meet speech objectives, nor how to do roles such as timer. For years in the UK I avoided being timer. Firstly, I wanted to speak. Secondly, I was scared to operate the lights. 

HOW I LEARNED TIMING

Finally, in Singapore, I was one of three timers in a contest. The incentive was that in Singapore contest timers are given a small certificate of appreciation and a tiny gift from a pound or dollar store, such as a notebook. 

I had plenty of advice for other timers: Find a quotation about time. Check the timing on the agenda. Look confident so that speakers and visitors are confident. Don't ask what to do loudly in front of newcomers. Ask a committee member for advice privately in advance. 

Don't apologise. Don't say, 'Sorry, sorry'. Instead say, 'Thank you for that information', or, 'Thank you for that decision', or, 'Thank you for that update'. 

My mentor for this timer role was my good friend Carolyn who was in charge, taking the responsibility. She showed me how to use my mobile as a timer. 

I jumped from being the person who kept refusing to be a timer, to the one who wanted the timer role. I wanted to practise my new skill. I had learned how to use my phone to time my own speeches. I wanted the small free gift. I wanted to contribute because I was sharing in the free food at the contest, although I was not paying a club membership fee. I also wanted to complete my manual of roles needed for a Competent Leader certificate.

CHALLENGES

Problems Mentors Can Solve

1 Some new members join and never come to meetings or watch for 6 months, a year, even two years and never give a speech.

2 Old members drop out because speech slots are allotted to newcomers, ribbons go to newcomers, nobody is their mentor so they miss out on networking and friendship.

3 A person takes on the role of mentoring co-ordinator but gets disheartened and confused when members don't reply to emails and phone calls. 

Answers For What Mentors Can Do

Co-ordinating mentors sounds simple but involves a lot of briefing and chasing. It's too much work to add to other committee members.

Your club needs a specific Mentoring co-ordinator helped by two others, a committee of three. 

If any member or mentor is absent for more than two meetings they must ask another person to take over their role.

You need one mentor to ensure first timers give a first speech which fulfils manual objective.

You need a life coach mentor to ensure the mentee is fulfilling their aim, whether it's to complete a specific project such as a wedding speech or funeral speech. 

You need a mentor as a life coach to ensure that the speeches add up to a set on a theme presenting the mentee as an expert who can become a professional speaker to businesses or as a fund raiser for charities. 

Mentors need mentees to complete project 8 of the CL manual. This offers two options: Mentor a new member's first three speeches. Mentor an existing member.

A member can have more than one mentor. In fact every member should have a backup mentor. And every mentor should have a second potential mentee. Why? Because often a member toes on holiday or is away on business. Younger members drop out because they move house, get a job in another area, or have a baby. Older members drop out because they become carers for a parent, go into hospital, retire overseas.

You can cling onto your former members and mentors by keeping them on a list of backup mentees and keep in touch by email and Skype.

MY FIRST MENTOR, INDRA

I’m going to tell you about my first mentor, Indra, my mentee . 

My first mentor, Indra Sikdar taught me to use props.

Later, I went to Singapore and mentored Martin Doe on Skype.

Indra was my mentor when I first joined the club. He came round to my house the weekend before and listened to my speech. He arrived promptly at 11 and left at 12. 

You can be a mutual mentor. Every member.

MY FIRST MENTEE - WARREN SHENG

I was away in Singapore when I was emailed that new member Warren Sheng had requested me as a mentor. I was immensely flattered. Warren Sheng is of Taiwanese origin. I must have spent several hours listening to his life story for his first speech, condensing the stories, identifying what is most interesting to an English audience. he rewarded me in two ways, with a present and with praise. He took me to a musical for which he had free tickets. He praised me at every meeting for months, years afterwards. Just as I still praise Indra for inspiring me to use props. 

If the president and VPE are busy, 

CLUB MENTORING CHECKLISTS

1 Keep a mentoring list. Start with giving the mentoring co-ordinator a list of members. Inform them of the name and email and phone number of new members, the new members experience in speaking, their fears, and hopes or aims.

MEMBERSHIP PR

At the start of every meeting, PR / President / Membership / meeter and greeter should tell newcomers if they are planning to join a club, think of who they would like as a mentor, who they would like to mentor, what kind of progress they want (using props and slides, adding humour, structuring speeches, finding subjects or expertise.

Those who join a club for fun, to make friends, might be aiming at being entertaining. They could be directed to mentors who are good at humour, to watching videos of humorous speeches.

HOD'S MEMBERSHIP MAN MIKE

In HOD we found trouble matching up mentors and mentees. Firstly, some mentors were not confident in mentoring advanced speeches. Our revised system was to appoint an expert for each type of speech, one for visual aids, one for props, one for humour. Mike, the membership secretary who dealt with new members, had already been mentor for a couple of new members, so he became mentor for all new members. That had the advantage of getting all the new embers started. Nobody had to exchange information or keep lists. He already had the members details. He already had rapport.

Any disadvantages? In some clubs the president mentors all the bright, young, pretty girls. Other members are offered as mentees the challenges, those who cannot speak or write English, so you spend two hours trying to work out what they mean, listening to long explanation, offering three alternatives for every sentence. Those absentee members who are overseas or away sick. They never complete three speeches needed for the mentorship project 8. Other new members are fussy, picky, dissatisfied, keep falling out with people and  / or keep changing mentors. Emails are not answered by people who are too busy. Some people will happily chat on the phone but won't answer emails. The productive, busy people have a large inbox and ignore non work emails. The shy ones are scared to open the email, write and re-word every email thirty times, then never send the reply. 

Whose Job Is It To Phone?

The busy people are impatient, "I never got a reply to my email. I'm not wasting any more time. It's up to the mentee to contact me!"  

Another (me) says, "But a new, shy member joining to gain confidence needs hand-holding and baby-sitting." Is the mentor's job to instruct, direct the mentee to manuals and websites? Or to listen to somebody's life story and and nod whilst the mentee talks through the options and makes their own decisions? 

A controlling mentor can frighten off a potential or actual member. I've heard people say, "If they don't want to contribute we don't want them in our club. They have no right to turn up for a competition and put us on their CV and do nothing for other members." 

However, others say, "It's the members who pay and don't turn up who keep our club financially afloat."

On the other hand, strict timekeepers, the judgers (on the Myers Briggs personality typing system) can be good at getting the shy to take action and give a speech. Indra actually drove me to the first meetings. No chance of being late or deciding at the last minute I couldn't do it. A mentor can smile and nod and rehearse a speech at the venue so the mentee walks on stage with the speech clear in their mind to give without notes.  

MEMBERS' AND MENTEES' MOTIVES

Those who join a club for career advancement (in house clubs) might be more interested in informative speeches, or adding humour to their dull presentations, or correcting their pronunciation, plus spelling, grammar and layout of slides.

Tell newcomers that they will be given a mentor, It’s not an option. They may already be an expert and just want feedback on their next project from an audience. Their first feedback is from an audience of one, the mentor. 

MENTORS' GAINS INCLUDE GRATITUTE

The mentor is not only doing them a favour. 

The mentee reciprocates by hearing the mentor’s speech.

He asked if i would listen to his speech. I could not say no.

Your club mentor tells mentees: You get two manuals.

The mentor should ensure the mentee signs up for roles, learns how to use the club website. The mentor is the go between. The mentor watches that the mentee starts. I’ve heard people say, I was a member for a year before I gave my first speech. When you go to school, everybody in the class is expected to attend every lesson and take the exam at the end of the year. Every club members should

Martin we had to send large files through Dropbox, not email. He won the competition and was voted best speaker.

PUBLIC RECOGNITION

Finally, in Singapore at one successful club they hold an induction ceremony. The mentee pledges in front of all the members to turn up on time, prepare speeches. The official photographer photograph the mentee with their mentor, usually a set of three or four pairs. 

Later, if a mentee wins a ribbon or contest, they might thank their mentor (like an acceptance speech at an Oscar ceremony by film stars I'd like to thank my mentor ...."

To Summarise

Any questions? (When training I would ask:)

"Who has a mentor? Who doesn’t have a mentor? Only the two visitors. Join the club and you get your manuals, and a mentor!"

HOD Experience

Mike Freedman of HOD has successfully mentored all the first timers at HOD after we found that it was complicated to organise lots of different mentors and we needed to get first timers on the right track. The membership sales person was already in touch with new members. This keeps up momentum. Sigh disadvantage that other would-be mentors might get overlooked. 

(One guy, the mentor, gets to meet all the pretty girls! Spreads the opportunities since in some clubs full of young singletons, usually the single club president gets to meet all the eligible girls.)

I think we shall have to create the rule that anybody who drops out of any role, whether a speaking slot at a club meeting, or a club officer training, has to find a substitute. You don’t have to do a job yourself. You just have to see that somebody does it. 

This is done in Singapore where a large proportion of members are working and the president cannot fill several slots at the last minute. People are often away working, so they send an email to half a dozen people, sometimes on what’s ap, asking 'who can replace me. I got lots of opportunities from people who dropped out. In this case Lorna may have been taken by surprise. In future we could set up a kind of buddy system, including mentors and mentees taking over each other’s roles.

TIPS

Thanks to mentors and speakers (my helpers Lorna and Ruth from Harrovians, both on holiday) for telling us in good time that you can’t make the 2017 meeting or training date and sending in your accounts of your experiences. 

Thanks to Lorna for the good idea about guidelines for mentors and mentees. 

Action points:

1 Mentors’ committee/workshop ; Create 10 commandments

Create not just a handout to mentoring organisers but also we should create a ten commandments for mentors and mentees.

For Future Mentor Training In Club or In Area

 Would anybody else extravert from a club committee like to take the mentor's slot?

If not, ask somebody from another club. 

MENTORING COMMITTEE

Who should be on the mentoring committee?

Any member who does not have a committee role but wants to be involved with the fun and responsibility of helping the committee and running the club.

People often have two opposite kinds of skills. One loud extravert person can talk but not plan. 

Another quiet introvert can make plans and lists but is afraid to speak. Pair them up into a mentoring committee. 

One person has agendas and ideas. 

A second person lists action points. 

A third person hands out information, posts the list.

1 The talker is the mentoring PR, the go-between who pairs up the mentor and mentee. 

2 The record keeper lists mentors and mentees, checks that every new member has a mentee. Every experienced or advanced mentor gets a mentee to complete project 8 in the leadership manual which is vital to finishing the manual and getting the CL award.  

whichA third person is called upon to observe and backup, and takes over automatically when one of the others is on holiday. Ask mentors and mentees to notify each other and the mentoring co-ordinator.

GUIDELINES

Thanks to Lorna for suggesting guidelines. Each club can set its own guidelines. For example:

Mentoring co-ordinator Guidelines

Attend club office training. Obtain feedback from those who cannot attend. Give assistants guidelines. Meet other members at the committee meeting or club meeting. Update membership list and ask President to send all members the contact details and system for mentoring. 

Checklist:

1 Appoint committee.

2  Get their emails and phone numbers. 

3 Or connect on What's Ap.

4 See club membership list on line. (In UK on Easyspeak.)

5 Check each member has a mentor.

6 Make announcement at meetings about obtaining a mentor, eg before break time. Tell those needing mentors and mentees to go to a place, such as to the right of the food table to meet the mentoring committee.

7 Have photos of mentors and mentees. (This helps ensure that everybody in the club is paired, not one person mentoring everybody.)

8 Arrange a mentor thank you session for end of year, when mentees thank mentors and mentors thank mentees.

Mentor

Email mentee saying whether you can speak on phone (which hours), email, or Skype. Phone or email to discuss goal and year plan and first project, either a speech or a meeting role such as timer.  (Some members like to do roles first, and hear more speeches before doing their own ice breaker first speech. They also need time to prepare the first speech. Also some presidents, such as Sushil of Harrovians, like new members to do two roles before doing their first speech. Other clubs require all members to alternate speeches and roles.)

Mentee

Respond within a week, ideally within 24 hours.

LEARN FROM SUCCESSFUL MENTORS AND CLUBS

If the system doesn't work, try something new. 

CROSS-CLUB BUDDIES

Find another club and pair up mentors. Sometimes a member doesn't like to admit to other cub members that they need help, or other club members are doing different roles and are busy. 

If you need any help in my clubs (HOD, HARROVIANS in the UK, or BRADDELL HEIGHTS ADVANCED Club in Singapore, or any other club worldwide, please email me.  I am doing Mentoring as a High Performance Leadership Project and would be glad to help you. Don't hesitate. Contact me. I shall be glad to hear from you.

AUTHOR AND SPEAKER ANGELA

Angela Lansbury, B A Hons, CL, ACG.

Author of ten books by mainstream publishers and ten self-published through print on demand company Lulu.com:

Wedding Speeches and Toasts. (Ward Lock/Cassell.)

How to be the best man. (Ward Lock/Cassell.)

Quick Quotations. (Lulu.) One line easy to remember quotations.

Who Said What When. (Lulu.) A quotation for the day of the year, somebody who was born, died or gave a famous speech on that day.

(I use quotations from my books if I am asked to quickly brief/mentor a member at a meeting. You can take a free look at the books of quotations on line or if you meet me. If you want to keep a hard copy you can pay for it and the postage and packing on line. Or buy a signed copy from me at meetings. 

Prices range from £6 to £20, depending on the thickness of the book which reflects first, how long it took to research, write and edit - a year, 18 months or two year, and secondly the cost of printing, thirdly plus posting cost which is affected by the weight of the book plus the discount offer from the printers at the time I ordered the books. I can also sign the book and create a quotation as a personalised dedication for you based on your name and skills.

To find my details or contact me within the UK you can use the UK club co-ordination system Easy Speak.

On Facebook general comments are public, but if you become a friend you can also message me privately through the messaging system.

HANDOUT 
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Challenging The Judge On Table Topics

A table topic is only two minutes, not the five to seven minutes of the Prepared speech. (Actually a speech of four and half minutes is allowed. However, most speakers go over time. I have only seen the occasional speaker (twice in ten years) who forgets their speech and loses heart and leaves. I have watched them forget, start again, get lost again, give up again.

They did not think to sum up but left  abruptly and did not reach the five minutes. That's the problem with not having a proper set of notes to consult in an emergency. No husband or wife or mentor in the audience to shout a prompt.

The other problem is needing to read a speech like a memorised poem. You should have three main stories, and a clear link. Then the speech is like pearls on a chain. If it is a time line - title, explain title, summary, my childhood, may teenage years, where I am now, conclusion - repeat title, it would be hard to get lost.

A table topic is different. You have to devise the answer to the question. You can read/repeat the question which seals it in your mind so you don't wander off topic and this gives time to think but takes up time reducing the number of points you can make.  If it's a long question, or quotation, you have time to really both halves.

A recent challenge took place at a contest at Singapore's venue on the East coast near Changi airport. The topic was a quotation by Churchill, about optimism and pessimism.

Most contestants heard the topic, then took hold of the left hand side of the piece of paper with one hand, their right hand, sharing the paper with the contest chair,  and read it silently, or took the paper in both hands and read it silently or aloud and then handed it back.

One contestant took hold of the paper and kept hold of it. He answered the first half of the question and from where I was sitting (a few rows back) seemed to put it in his pocket. (I worried through the whole speech that he would 'lose' it, leaving the rest of the contestants with no topic1

Then, if I both saw and remembered rightly, he got it out again to read it again to be sure he answered the second half of the question.

Later contestants are not allowed the advantage of hearing the question prior to their entrance, nor hearing another speaker before they speak, so the only rival contestant who saw this and objected must have been a previous contestant. (Or one whose friends and family or fellow club members had told him about it. Only the contestant could object, not his club members or family members in the audience.)

When the chief judge returned with the results, a member of the audience (the objecting contestant) raised his hands to say he had an objection. The judge said to the audience that he had already been told of the objection.

The contestant in the audience protested that everybody should hear the objection and the reasons for it and have a proper debate on the subject in case it arose again.

By now members of the audience were intrigued, curious, anxious to know, and supported the contestant objecting and wanted to hear the objection.

The objection was that the person who kept hold of the piece of paper with the topic a) should not have been allowed to do so and it was against the rules and this should not be allowed in future contests b) the contestant who did so if it was against the rules should possibly be disqualified for doing so.

Various members of the audience started saying that it was or wasn't in the rules, and some people got out their handphones (previously off and silent during contests so as to not distract speakers)and starting hunting on line. Nobody could find a specific rule about the contestant not being allowed to keep hold of the paper.

The Chief judge said that the chief Judge's ruling was final. He remained very calm, decisive, polite to the parties and good-humoured, treating it not as a confrontation but as an interesting technical point. After two or three times saying that the judge's decision was final, he ended by drawing a conclusion by saying we had to finish so that people could go home but could continue debating the point later.

The person who complained turned out to be one of the (two, I think) winners going forward to the next contest.

The Chief Judge said that the objection had nothing to do with the fact that he had won. (Which is decided by the number of points allocated to each of the top three speakers, thee points for those you think should be first, two points to the person who is second, one point to the person who is third. If the number of points is equal for any of the top three, then the tie-breaker's scoring is used. The tie-breaker's marks are not needed and not checked unless there is a query.

***

Angela Lansbury, speaker, winner of club contests (UK), judge and tie-breaker judge in some contests (UK and Singapore). You are not allowed to be a judge at your club or another club if you are a speaker in a contest in previous contest in that area or listed as a future contestant at another club in the area (which comprises about four or five clubs - too complicated to go into here, but you get the idea). Equally you cannot be a contestant if you have previously been a judge.

Lots more information on club websites and the forums on LinkedIn. I have written this post because I have far more to say than would be reasonable to write on the forums where each comment is about 3-5 sentences and 3-5 lines long.

Angela Lansbury, CL, ACG.

Mentoring a Speech - and ideas for speech and props

It is very true that teaching others helps you to learn. I have just mentored somebody with their speech. One idea I gave them about props I have just used for my own speech. Can you guess what it is? Read on.

I wrote to my mentee: What project is it? Five? Your body speaks?

Video yourself and note the gestures you make and exaggerate them and write them into the draft in another colour. Make sure you have a gesture or movement every couple of sentences.

From what I remember of your test speech at Harrovians’ contest, as well as other people’s, you had good stage control already, and lots of conversation. Although this project is not about voice, you need to remember these 

points:

1 When asking a rhetorical question pause, raise eyebrows. If you don’t want shouting and heckling tell them to make a mental (or written) note.

If expecting an answer, show the audience you expect an answer.

2 If this is a speech to Toastmasters (eg to deliver as an officer training workshop or a training for newcomers, rather than simply rehearsing at Toastmasters for another occasion such as a wedding speech) make every other sentence related to Toastmasters, (eg climbing through the manual). You could alter your tone for each part - eg extra enthusiasm, smiling, speaking louder for all the sentences relating to toastmasters, or vice versa. 

3 Avoid being monotone - find a word to emphasise and underline it in the speech

4 Allow extra time if you are crossing the stage without saying anything or if walking about will slow down your delivery.

5 Try to get the important word  at the end of the sentence. Don’t tail off at the end of the sentence, going quieter or losing the last word. eg end on mount TOP, rather than top of the mountain. Add a few shorter sentences for variety.

You already did a good job of conversation in your last speech. Maybe you can invent an imaginary mountain climbing guide, perhaps with a German accent, encouraging you or not allowing you to fall back or ignoring your protest.

Which country is the mountain? Plenty of scope for two different accents. 

I hope this helps.

Now, dear reader, you may have gathered which tip I am using in my speech.

 Two or three copies of the photo in progressively larger sizes.

Angela Lansbury BA Hons, CL, ACG.

How to convince members to mentor others?

TM has an educational workshop on mentoring with the slides you show and a question and answer session at the end.

Give examples of a mentor and a mentee session. Being a mentor is just like being an evaluator. You both get points and learn. Sometimes the mentor only has to listen as the mentee talks through the problems, discusses one, two or three solutions, and finds the action and decides to do it. A mentor is evaluated in the CL manual. You could add the public mentoring session by running publicly through how the mentoring is then evaluated.

Angela Lansbury, author of Quick Quotations.

Speech Tips video, Wigs For Cancer Patients, This life at HOD Meeting Jan 7 2015

Positive Peter, the President
Positive Peter, our HOD President, Peter Jacques, opened the meeting enthusiastically, commenting alliteratively on the 'terrific turnout'. He asked us all to say Hello to the guests. Everybody waved at the guests.
 He asked those who attended the Xmas party to put up their hands and told everybody else that those who'd been to the party were smiling. He reminded us that members could attend a BBQ party in the summer as well as looking forward to next year's party.

He asked if any guest had experience in speaking, and asked that person, 'Please come up and join me,' and gave them a printed copy of the Toastmasters International mission statement to read to us.

Peter told us to 'have a good time' and that speakers should remember 'we are on your side'.

Jolly Justas, the TME
Our Toastmaster of the evening was jolly Justas, who told us we had 24 meetings and 72 speeches to enjoy. We could also help ourselves to enjoy a cup of water at the table at the door of the hall where we met. His theme was the Beatles "All we need is love" which had inspired him to come to England. He also told us that 'each of you has the right to vote'.

Looking back at my notes, I find that he referred to the place where we have coffee and chocolate biscuits at break time as the Rest room, which in the USA is the toilet. He should have said Recreation room. I forgot to mention it later when I was GE and don't remember the Grammarian mentioning it.

He told everybody, 'we like to clap!'
His great joke was when showing us the voting slips, he told us that he won a ribbon for best speech by voting for himself when everybody else forgot to vote.

Timing
Timer of the evening was a newcomer, so President Peter explained timings in a twosome with the new timer who held up the green, yellow and red timing cards. A great system to act as a duo, with the more experienced person leading the way, the other person learning and taking part in a supporting role. Like a comedy duo.

Peter's parting words were positive, 'Try to stick to timings and have a great time'. Only when typing this up did I notice the pun in the last two words.

Ah Counter, Roni
Roni Savage was given the role of Ah counter, a role which was introduced to the club only recently. When you have lots of people in the audience, or new members or guests, it's an extra role you can give out which sounds easy and even the shyest person can hardly refuse.

She told us she would be looking for 'crutch words'.

Grammarian, Lily
Lily arrived on stage saying 'Thank you, Mr Toastmaster'. In some clubs the roles of Ah counter and Grammarian are rolled into one.

Vowels, Consonants and Pronunciation
Notice the difference between crutch and crotch. What a difference in visions a vowel can make.

Regarding pronunciation, without mentioning any names, a couple of people during the evening dropped their Gs. French is a language where it has become the norm to drop the last letter.

However, in English we still expect the word speaking to be pronounced speaking and not speak in. The word writing should be pronounced writing, not write in. Smiling should be pronounced smiling, not smile in.

Pronounce the words correctly to get praise from English speakers. You will also get increased understanding from those struggling with English as a second language.

This Life Joke by Sandeep
We opened the prepared speech section with an introductory speech by Sandeep which he entitled This Lifetime. His memorable joke was that Hindus believe in reincarnation so they have many lives, but with only a 5-7 minute slot he would limit himself to one life, the present one.

Sandeep said his father's job meant that Sandeep kept changing schools. This made him feel like an outsider.

How interesting - because so many people say the same but give different reasons, they were a different race or religion or simply changed schools. Newcomers at a club meeting also feel like outsiders, until they are welcomed, or assigned a mentor.

Making A Difference by Eli
Eli had a huge roll-down poster about the charity he is promoting which gives wigs to children having cancer treatment so they can feel confident and glamorous.

Speech Writing tips from Coralie
Coralie's innovation was a video presentation on how to write a speech, to help those who tell mentors they don't know where to begin. Her useful advice included always carry a notebook and pencil specifically for recording speech ideas. This was backed up by her holding up and pen and pencil, a photo of a person writing, and holding up a mobile phone which can be used for note taking.

After the break, Justas made us all stand up and copy his slow hand movements as he hand clapped three times. He said teachers do that to make pupils pay attention to the teacher.

The Break
During the break we enjoyed a very good selection of chocolate biscuits.

Justas addressed the speakers by roles and first names prefaced by the word Mr - please welcome Mr David.

In my General Evaluator role I commented that it simultaneously paid the person an honour, whilst being friendly.

You can watch my evaluation of the evaluators on video.

Angela Lansbury, travel writer and photographer, author and speaker.

Jolly Justas

President, Positive Peter helps timer who holds cards

Eli's speech about helping children with cancer feel better by wearing wigs

Coralie's video of speech tips included suggesting recording speech ideas on your mobile phone

Photos by Angela Lansbury.

Jolly Justas presents Angela Lansbury with ribbon for best evaluator of topics

Angela Lansbury, CL, ACG