The Christmas Party at Harrovians' Speakers' Club in Glebe Hall, Glebe Road, Stanmore, Harrow.
No expense spared, a potluck supper, mostly home-made, last year's Santa Claus outfit, a folding plastic tree from Poundland but you wouldn't believe what a wonderful time we had. Starting with all the food, piled onto paper plates, big chunks of succulent boneless bbq chicken, and potato patties, and a vegetable casserole, couscous and two sorts of rice. Or oriental vegetarian rolls, from Minh Tan, - on a separate table, attracting vegetarians and those on special diets, only oriental food!
After that English style mince pies, Italian/Spanish/Venezuelan Panettone (a pyramid of bread with candied peel in sweet eggy dough) from Jesus, who is from Venezuela. Plus, of course, crisps, chocolates, chocolate biscuits, and the healthy option of three colours of grapes. I was just contemplating a second piece of the flan of apricots on almond tart, when we were called to hear by past president Warren Sheng. He is a stickler for time, what in Yiddish would be called a Yekke, which is German for jacket.
However, Warren, amusing us with his failed attempts to don the Santa jacket, hat and beard, which he was handed as he welcomed us, encouraged by the well-fed folks' amicable laughter, quickly became even more jovial than President Indra, who last year was, as Warren pointed out, before the diet and swimming and slimming was, a suitably rotund Santa.
Santa Clause, past president Warren Sheng
Last year we had a speech on the origins of the symbols of Christmas such as the Christmas tree, crackers and cards.
This year we had four entertaining and informative speeches, but nothing seasonal. We started with Seema whose project was an amusing speech demonstrating gestures. She had cleverly chosen gestures as her theme, international gestures with different meanings in different countries. For example, V signs, thumbs up, thumb and forefinger making an O.
'What does this sign mean? It doesn't mean what you think it means ...' I've never been to a non-alcoholic party where the audience was in such hysterics. Warren and Gosbert and Seema all managed to use innuendo which was much funnier than if they'd actually said anything rude.
Chinemelu Ezeh had been timer but leapt up onto the stage as he was next. He kindly told us that his name was abbreviated to Chi (pronounced chee as in cheese or cheek - by now the audience was into helpful suggestions, otherwise known as heckling or banter.)
The emotional hook of his speech was how he had come from a poor (financially poor) background, where the children had to earn their gifts, which would be given later, a lesson in 'delayed gratification'. This training helped him in his determination to study and enabled him to achieve the level of PhD. He told us he is now studying robotic medicine.
Minh Tran started her speech by asking what was the most dangerous animal? Shouts of: lion, crocodile ....?
No, it was mosquito, more deaths a year, millions in Africa, than any other living creature. Mosquitos are small but very dangerous. They bite. (Audience muttering. Heckling.) Females are the only ones which bite. (More hecking.)
'At dawn or dusk,' 'needing blood for the babies which they produce after copulating. 'What did she say? Something like 'The male mosquitoes droop, drop and die after copulating - which is very sad'. (Gosbert and Warren are into a double act on this subject, variations of, 'just like us,' and, 'we know how it must feel!') Audience is off into hysterics again.
She ended by telling us the way to stop the mosquito biting includes Deet. At the previous suggestion of her mentor Warren, she had turned her list into an acronym.
Warren, as Toastmaster of the evening linking each speaker or event with the next, commented that 'the moral is don't go to Africa'. Somebody added, 'Or India'. Another person suggested, 'Or Acton.'
The final of the four speeches was by Shazia who told us about learning Urdu and Arabic. She had good visual aids of the letters abc in Arabic. She described how she went to practise her Arabic in a restaurant in the Edgware Road, London, but addressed the waiter with words which were female, because she had learned the female endings, but he was male and he looked offended and the restaurant was suddenly hushed.
Speaking of food, we were all feeling hungry again. It was break time for more food. We didn't have table topics but instead broke for seconds of the food and a second lot of socialising.
The 'best speech' ribbon winners, two, were jointly Chi and Minh.
All the evaluations were perspicacious - enthusiastic, rewarding the speakers with appreciation, but also insightful with helpful suggestions on how to make speeches even better.
My evaluation of Seema was joint winner of the ribbon for Best Evaluation. I gestured to Veeren that he should take the ribbon and I would get another later. I forgot to ask Indra for a ribbon, so I have cut a piece of paper the size of ribbon and written on it the date and club where I won.
I went back to trying not to eat the apricot tart, which was bought from the bakery in Hatch End.
Our guest plans to become a member by the next meeting of the new year 2015. You can see Harrovians on Facebook. You might find a meeting mentioned on Meetup. Go to the Harrovians website to send a message to one of the committee if you want to come along.
The treats in store for the New Year include a visit from Hilary Briggs. The mayor of Harrow will be at the February speech contest.
From left: Indra, Veeren, Angela.
Angela Lansbury
Past president of Harrovian Speakers.
Currently member of Harrovian Speakers which meets on Mondays, and HOD which meets on Thursdays. Do come to out next meeting.
