Harrovians January and February News: Speeches, Harrow Mayor and Contests 2015

This newsletter covers the speeches at Meetings on Jan 5 and 19 and the forthcoming contests Feb 2nd attended by Harrow's mayor.


Jan 5 What an Evening!



Jan 19 What an Evening!

Speech by President Indra Sikdar, titled, Do you think immigration to the UK is a good or bad thing?

Seema Menon on Climatic Change and Greener Planet
Seema ended with a positive message, Let's protect our earth.

Thulasi Arunthavanathan

Lorna Burns on conversing with ease.
One of her useful tips was use open-ended questions.

Karen Carter offered me a useful insight on positive thinking and being warm and encouraging and not alienating people. Social workers are told never to use the word bad.
































President Indra Sikdar presents ribbons to award winning speakers and evaluators.

Committee Meeting
Held at the home of President Indra Sikdar.
Ruth Vishnick produced biscuits in a doggie biscuit tin. All members are invited to the next committee meeting(s). Please come along to see what the committee does and you might be inspired to assist and shadow a committee member. This will help you to be confident about standing for a committee role and helping the club prosper this year or next. Committee meetings are held at a member's home and the food and drink is on a pot luck basis so if you have special diets just bring what you would like to eat and share and show.

Ruth Vishnick is a former president of Harrovians. She has given speeches on running a tea shop, making scones, and the pleasures of having a dog.

Club Officer Training
Harrovians members who attended:

Indra Sikdar
Angela Lansbury
Seema Menon
Warren Sheng

 Seema with slides at Club Officer Training

Warren Sheng at Club Officers Training at the site of sister club HOD which meets on the first and third Thursdays each month. More pictures of this event on Facebook.

International Contest - what an evening!
Takes place Monday Feb 2nd attended by the Mayor of Harrow.
You will hear planned speeches by several experienced speakers - they need to have completed at least six speeches from the manual. Then for the second contest a target speaker delivers a speech and each of the evaluators has to analyse the speech giving the good aspects and suggesting improvements.

The Mayor of Harrow
VIP, guest of honour, will be this year's mayor of Harrow. The Mayor for the municipal year 2014/15 is The Worshipful The Mayor, Councillor Ajay Maru.
For more details about the mayor see the council website.
http://www.harrow.gov.uk/info/200033/elections_and_representatives/21/the_mayor_of_harrow

So you can feel at ease meeting our illustrious mayor, here is his photo. He is wearing his badge of office - and a red coat!

Angela Lansbury is a past president or HARROVIANS and with the help of Indra Sikdar has compiled the first copy of the History of Harrovians speakers club, illustrated with photos of founder members Indra, Imke, Kayode, the Harrow & Wealdstone pub with the supposed Weald Stone marking the boundary of Harrow Wealdstone, and the heritage plaque, and many more previous well known members, such as Alan McMahon, now Toastmasters Area Governor and highlights of events - such as being locked out of venues, performing speeches on street corners and parks. Price of paperback £10. It can also be downloaded.

Angela Lansbury BA Hons, CC ACG, is the author of twenty books including two paperbacks which may interest you: Quick Quotations for speakers and writers; Who Said What When? quotations for every day of the year, Jan 1 to Dec 31.

Post being updated with more text and photos. Come back later.

Word of the day: arcane

arcane

How to write neatly on a board

I asked somebody if they would write on the board during my speech at Club Officer Training. They replied that they had dreadful writing. I started writing a reply and ended up with too much for an email. But here it is in full for your benefit.

First check that any board is a public board and not left behind by the previous speaker. 

Yes, serious problem. I once wrote on a board. Later the owner returned. He was upset that I had written on it using an indelible marker I had found under the board and assumed was part of the ensemble.

Luckily another member was able to tell me that alcohol removes felt tips which are not water soluble. He knew because kids at his school often wrote rude words on boards with so-called indelible wash proof markers.

After hunting through the nearby bar and rejecting the dark rums which might stain we found some clear vodka. It would have cost a lot to buy vodka if we'd had to do that. Fortunately somebody took over as I was by now in a state of nervous collapse. 

The owner of the board said that if the writing could not be removed somebody would have to pay for a new board, needed at his workplace. Since no club or insurance magically appeared, it seemed he wanted me to pay for a new board. 

My fist thought was no. My second thought was I had no choice. Make the best of it. I'd been meaning to buy a board for myself anyway. I was now close to tears hunting for my cheque book, in such a panic it was a missing cheque book. 

I was now obliged to write a cheque for well over a hundred pounds.  So we were in a second dispute about the cost of the board, since others said one can by a similar board half the price.) We were on the point of dividing into two camps of rival clubs and rival supporters, at the amount of loss and cost on both side.  I was about to lose my lift home, about 50 miles on the motorway. 

Fortunately, the alcohol did the trick. We are now all friends - and this is told as a funny story. Coralie told it as the punchline to a humorous 'roast'.  The punchline was that I had written on the board the title of my latest book: How To Get Out Of The Mess You Are In.

So please check whose board you are writing on. Check the pens are suitable. If not, consider using water or use alcohol for removal of text which others do not want left on their board.

How to write neatly on a board:

I did this at a meeting last week when I had no other role and could not refuse somebody who had done me lots of favours. (Don’t ask. OK - he introduced to to Toastmasters and gives me lots of lifts. He was also President of the club.) 

I also had been told I had terrible writing or could not read back my own writing from my handwritten notes but I had to do it. Writing these notes for you has helped me recall what I learned in order to do it better next time or help others. 

Draw your grid at the meeting before the start of the meeting - so you know you have easel which won’t fall and suitable pens. 

IN ADVANCE

Check who owns the board and that you have permission to write.

1 The trick is to draw a frame,  You need 

a) a top space for a title or change of title or subtitle, 

b) left margin for numbers, or letters, or bullet points, 

c)  a right margin for modifiers, 

d) space under frame to write afterthoughts and corrections or modifiers. 

2 Divide the board

a) into two vertical columns 

b) then two or more oblongs. 

You’ve learned the hard part - how to write holding the marker.

You can lift your arm. You have trained your eye and hand to write slowly and level.

First time does not have to be perfect, just good enough.

WHEN ASKED TO WRITE

Do not block the board so people can’t see it. 

Stand aside whilst writing. If that is not possible, stand back after writing. Change from right to left occasionally so that you do not block the view from one direction all the time.

Smile and Listen

Smile and look enthusiastic, as if you are enjoying the job and are really pleased to add what the speaker or audience have said.

When doing nothing either look keenly at the board or at the speaker, or at the audience for their suggestions or corrections.

Get spelling right

Ask in advance for a list of words you might have to write.

If you can’t spell a word, or want to be sure, ask the speaker or audience.

a) Writing should look neat in photos promoting the speaker and the club.

    b) Large enough and clear enough for audience/presenter to read and copy. 

  

   Not so much on a small page so that readers are confused. If you have too many suggestions and feedback, if necessary stop and recap - then start new page of the flip chart. Or pause for everybody to see/take a photo, then wipe clean.

How to keep board visible to all the audience

b) Turn board if possible half way through so that those at far right and far left can see.

If you can’t turn the board - invite those who can’t see to move nearer.Then - when you are called, write slowly.  Watch the tops of the letters are level. Make all the circles and loops round, practise circles for  a o e.

practise or watch letters are same height f l th. Keep letters same length p y g, and double letters tt. 

How to write neatly

Keep any upright and horizontal lines such as capital L parallel with the margins of your oblong - matching any previous letter or word.

Writing on the board is a great non-speaking job to award to somebody who has no other role, especially a shy person who likes to half turn their back on the audience and say nothing.

If you can’t do it, coach somebody else. 

Self confidence in writing

This is what you say:

1 Hypnotise yourself and encourage yourself using NLP (near-linguistic programming -  - put negatives in the past, positives in the future: ' I had terrible writing now but by the time of the meeting I will write perfectly’.

Say it three times. (Hypnosis is saying something three times to somebody who is keen to listen. Brainwashing is saying something non stop for hours to somebody who is trying not to listen.)

Practise alone, with children, grandchildren or others

2 Start praising writing on that grandchild’s kiddie board I saw in your kitchen (tI wrote this to Mike F)

3 Ask your grandchild for help - and honest appraisal - practise together so your both learn

4 Room for improvement - I didn’t tell you that you can't write well yet - you admitted it

5 Surprise us all and impress us at how your writing has improved - take a before and after video - copy your favourite writing style using words we are likely to need

6 Write just one word a day - slowly, using a ruler to keep the lower edge straight.

When to remove the board

Stay nearby to move board out of way of next speaker or Toastmaster of the Day providing links.

Be ready to bring board back  or ask Sergeant at Arms to move board if needed for a summary  or second session.

Check board is returned to owner/cupboard because speaker may be in a hurry to remove notes from pedestal or busy answering series from audience.

Remove private notes from the easel or flip chart so that they do not distract the next speaker, nor another club or public meeting in the same hall at a later date.

Techie Alternative

If you cannot write but can use a computer/laptop/ipad - worst case scenario, you are disabled, or maybe just so used to computers you are scared of writing - or you are writing in a foreign language -
Project onto a screen and type in the letters in a font which mimics handwriting. You can find an pa which uploads one word at a time or even adds one letter at a time. This is done in lots of promotional videos made in the USA as the speaker speaks and hand appears to draw cartoons and captions one line at a time but very fast at the speed of the speaker's speech.

Follow up speech on handwriting by me or you or others

 Will somebody who can write neatly on a board (a teacher?) please give a demo/ speech about it to the club or Club Officer Training..

Note to Speaker/TM - Remember to award copious thanks and praise to the writer.

I’m going to write this on my blog. I must take up life coaching for a living. I could do this for schools and uni and businesses.

 All reasonable offer accepted. You can pay with gold, cash or chocolate biscuits.

Or buy my giant book How To Get Out Of The Mess You’re In. 

Only £7.50, for an signed copy - a bargain because I have already done the research, and paid for printing, and postage.

How Should You Dress For A Public Meeting - Smart or Casual?

I usually dress up for speakers' meetings. We often take photos of ourselves or others. Even if not on the programme, you are in the audience in a group photo. You win a table topic. The group wants a group photo. A photo of somebody else, such as a VIP being photographed by a newspaper photographer, shows you in the background.

You might not even notice yourself being photographed. At a meeting somebody might take a selfie of themselves alone or with their family and friends and accidentally catch you on the edge of the picture.

Whenever I forget or decide I'm too busy, or I'll change later in the day, it is a mistake. I end up missing an opportunity to show myself at my best and reflect well on the club.

 I was sitting at home not very smartly dressed at breakfast, nobody to see me I thought, when a member of the family decided to try out the focus on their camera and took some pictures of me. If I'd been wearing a new outfit I could have asked them to keep the photo. I risk them forgetting to delete the photo.

So my new year's resolution, dress every day/meeting right from the moment you get up as if your photo will appear in a national newspaper and online worldwide. Even when you are alone, you could be photographed. Some people tape over the camera on their laptop because hackers can log in remotely and take photos of you - as you scowl at mistakes, yawn, or sit in your dressing gown.

Make sure if you were photographed now, you would show your clothes, posture and smile to reflect well on yourself, those with you, and every organisation with which you are connected.

I was asked by a committee member (who I hope will be our next President) about membership numbers in both clubs I belong to in the UK and what causes membership to go up and down. She will be incorporating and adapting some of these ideas in her presentation at the next Club Officer Training.

1Email HQ in USA. They should have exact membership figures. Indra may be able to help. He was a founder member of Harrovians and introduced me and was my mentor. He recruited me from another local club, Harrow Writers' Circle.

2 We used to have a list of members and their addresses, phone numbers and emails which was given to all new members so everybody knew the exact membership number every other month. This was discontinued for security reasons. 

3 It would be helpful to have the president announcing the membership numbers at every meeting. Then every committee members and and ordinary members and guest would know where they stand. (Some guests would like to join a busy club which is obviously successful and in demand. Others prefer a small club where they can quickly get a committee role, become a VIP, improve their CV, and get speaking slots to achieve their CC or CL certificate within a year, whilst living in London, ready for next job interview/post, wedding speech in Spring or summer, or to get results like O level in one year for the price of one year’s membership fee.

4 Membership increased when we were the only club in the area meeting twice a month and nearest rival was HOD meeting only once a month and Watford did not exist and we met at a pub in central Harrow near the tube station. The president was a charismatic single man who held committee meetings at his house and had a series of girlfriends. Membership was challenged by some disappearing presidents (one lasted less than a month - achieving his aim of getting promoted to a good job). We also had loss of and change of venue, our pub meeting place closed down. We were originally double the size of HOD 30-40 compared to their 15-20. HOD was retired people in no hurry to complete manuals,a social group rising money for charity.

5 The biggest challenge is actually having a membership secretary who signs people up at meetings. I was signed up at the first meeting I attended by Ann Connolly. She had the manuals and said if I wrote a cheque, for less than £100, I would have a year’s membership, a mentor, be on the next meeting programme with my first speech, and she would give me the two manuals she showed me at break time. I joined instantly to get the manuals and join the group.

6 membership sank when we had membership secretary who was away several meetings in a row on business and it was decided that ‘everyone’ would stand in which meant nobody did - everybody was engaged chatting to friends or arranging other matters.

7 We’ve had a lot of members between jobs reluctant to spend money and part with it. We’ve even had a president who was not a paid up members, naturally not pro-active in in persuading others to pay. 

8 At both Harrovians and HOD we’ve gone through periods of negative sales. Instead of selling the club and joining - and if you think the club is the best thing ever, you should be selling it, we’ve had negative statements:

a) Phrases containing negatives such as I can’t read your writing, I don’t want you to join and not come to meetings, 

9 One person should be delegated to talk people into joining, show manuals, take emails, fill in membership form (for those not computer literate or too busy). Mamership form and money in the hand is worth two in the hands of I’ll do it later. Take the money.

10 Young family members were on another committee and were vanishing to take children to London when we were meeting for training up in St Albans.

11 New computer-savvy presidents made great changes. Easy Speak enables you to keep track.

12 Members who leave often come back months or even years later. If we keep emailing our passive list, we can sometimes reclaim members later.

13 It is helpful to maintain goodwill, send at least a Xmas party invite to former members, phone them up, how’s your new baby?

14 Cross fertilisation of clubs is great. People often joint, even because a relative overseas belonged.

15 Membership secretary should know that the best club, toastmasters, tennis, whatever sort, loses members through illness, death, brith, marriage, new jobs, lack of jobs, lost interest, personality clash. You need to be adding at the same rate you are losing.

16 Membership secretary needs a goal of 2 new members per meeting. If you miss out for whatever reason on this goal over two or three meetings, you need to admit it and get help.

17 Once members realise the club will close if you don’t have money to pay the rent, pay USA HQ, have paid up members eligible for competitions, they will help.

18 I once said we needed members and needed to leaflet or knock on doors or nearby homes. Warren Sheng announced he would race out in the break. I thought he was joking. He knocked on four doors and his last call found somebody in who came and joined and was our Sergeant at Arms for a year, very convenient for him and us - even when he could not attend he crossed the road and opened up, put out chairs. 

The Power Of Repeating Short Phrases:

Angela Lansbury (annalondon8@gmail.com)

President Harrovian Speakers 2012; Associate Area Governor at Toastmasters International 2011

Toastmasters' teaches how to use persuasive speeches and rules for getting across an idea using repetition - framing or bookending, repetition, and a punchline. 

Think of beginnings: Once upon a time

Think of repetition: Chorus lines: He's got the whole world in his hands

Think of happy endings: They all lived happily ever after

Think of biblical phrases: Thy rod and staff they comfort me - though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil

Motivational phrases Feel the fear and do it anyway

Repetition technigues are used to convince people of a truth or course of action in children and adults

1 Speeches
2 Rote learning (times tables, poetry)
3 Hypnosis (confidence, losing weight, conquering fear)
4 Superstition (always throw salt, don't walk under ladders)
5 Safety rules

6 Brainwashing
7 Religion (learn to say to yourself or repeat aloud to others: prayers, mantras, tracts, entire books, phrases said when you are born, marry and die).
8 Amusing, memorable, short phrases, easily remembered and repeated.
9 A support group: Toastmasters, family, school, uni, alumni, religion, political party.

10 Changing one set of ideas for another or the reverse - leading to enthusiasm for the new and canvassing against the old (consider conversion to another religion, rejection of non believers). It is amazing how quickly you can get a large number of people killing whilst reciting a religious mantra, or sending a hashtag worldwide.

Understanding the effect of positives and negatives and repetition helps you understand your own internal motivation. You can maintain confidence, or destroy confidence, in yourself and other individuals (as a coach). 

Also public speaking can affect groups, committees, business, finance, sales and writing. We need to understand how these processes appeal, lose members, and recruit followers. Then we can see how speaking, the media, and propaganda, support leaders, heroes and villains, followers and supporters, the terrified and the terrorists, and can affect large numbers of people.

Angela Lansbury BA Hons. Red Research.
Author of How To Get Out Of The Mess You're In. Speaker, blogger, trainer. Books. Articles. Poetry. Puppets. HOD speakers. Harrovians Speakers. YouTube. Facebook. LinkedIn.

What the Brighton Speakers conference taught us about performing on stage, using props and improvising songs

At the Brighton Toastmasters conference we spent a lot of time and money over a weekend learning to improve our performance of a speech, workshop or show on stage. If you could not afford the time or money, here is my summary of what we learned. I learned three things, how to use the stage, how to use yourself as a prop, and how to create a show using the audience and improvising rhyming couplets in a song.

Performing on stage
Gaynor showed us how to use the whole stage. You should use the back the front, walk from the back to the front, and from one side to the other.

The winner of the humorous speech contest used himself, or rather his beard as a prop. It is always good to have a memorable prop. But you might forget it. Remembering it is an anxiety. You must not turn round to find it. You have to gather it off the stage.

But use yourself as the prop and you can never forget it. People will always remember your prop and speech every time they see you.

For example, I have long blonde hair. If I gave a speech about having blonde hair, or long hair, I could not forget it.

I sat in the front row.

Fear, Happiness and Improv Songwriting - What an Evening of speeches at Harrovians Monday 5 Jan 2014

What An Evening
Fear, Happiness and Improv Songwriting - What an Evening of speeches at Harrovians Monday 5 Jan 2014 at Glebe Hall, Stanmore, cosy with the electric fire.

What do you do when the President is away and not enough people reply to emails? While President Indra was away in India, or maybe an Indian restaurant, past past president Ruth Vishnick CC followed the precedents Indra and another past President Gosbert had established by reading out the Toastmasters mission statement. She then quickly, enthusiastically handed over steering the evening's proceedings to Minh, beaming, debut Toastmaster of the Evening.

Minh's New Year Theme
Minh Tran had received emails from several members on New Year Resolutions and tips for running your year and life. She had supplemented them with her own favourite ideas, selected from the internet, printed them out and placed them in an envelope for each person taking the stage to read. This system gave the evening a coherent running theme, as well as  holding the audience's attention with an element of surprise

Happy Time
Karen Carter, seemed very happy in her Happy Hour as time keeper of the evening. By happy chance, when Minh called Karen to tell us how the timing works, Karen selected a tip on time keeping, a quotation from Abraham Lincoln, that those of us poor in other ways are rich in time. Karen continued on a positive note, saying that as time keeper, her job was to help us keep to time.

So often I've heard time keepers emphasize negative aspects of running over time. I must remember to advise future timekeepers to emphasize the benefits of keeping to time.

How helpful it is to have a timekeeper warning us how well we are doing.  Speakers see they have successfully reached the green light for the minimum time allotted. Then they see orange, suggesting that it's a good time to move towards the conclusion. Finally, on the red light it's over - time's up - we have successfully spoken right to the last second, as Rudyard Kipling said in his poem If: 'filling every minute ...'

Grammarian
Grammarian Chinamelu Ezeh (Chi for short) gave us the word of the day, obstreperous.

Veeren Taylor presented a variety of table topics for brief impromptu speeches, all thought-provoking  subjects without being over-challenging.

Table Topics

Happiness -The First Prepared Speech Subject
Sachin Madhav

Introduction to happy Harri Sethi
Harri gave us a classic rags to riches story. In his childhood his father had fallen ill and while the parent was ill the business lost all its money. Harri grew up fast, with more responsibility than is usual for a child. The good news was he ended up, with his father's encouragement, seeking to be qualified to work in business and finance, coming to the UK to further his studies. He is now furthering his skills by attending our Toastmasters International speakers' training club.

Fear by Nigel Tranah

Evaluations of Speeches
Seema
Ruth
Warren evaluating Angela

Prize Winners
Prize winners were Nigel for best prepared speech.

Warren won a ribbon for best evaluation of a speech.

 For best impromptu table topic, Ampara.

For my speech on
What the Brighton Speakers conference taught us about performing on stage, using props and improvising songs, see next post.

Evaluations

CC = Competent Communicator (One who has completed the ten speeches in the first manual).
CL=Competent Leader
ACB= Advanced Communicator Bronze (20 speeches)
ACS=Advanced Communicator Silver (30 speeches)
ACG Advanced Communicator Gold (40 speeches)

Meetings are held twice, occasionally three times a month.
The next meeting is on Monday January 19th.
Speech Contest is Feb 2nd 2015.
Club Officer Training is at the venue of sister club HOD. (I am a member of both).
Guests are very welcome at both Toastmaster Clubs. if you wish to attend a meeting please contact the clubs through their website(s). Toastmasters International Find a club. The clubs are also on Facebook, LinkedIn and YouTube.

Angela Lansbury CC ACG

More Words of the Day - anodyne to ubiquitous

anodyne
archetype
declaim
dystopia
egregious
eschewed
eulogy, eulogise
euphemism
hegemony
iconic
oligarchy
plethora
prosaic
prototype
protagonist
Solipsist
ubiquitous

What I learned about Improving Improv at Brighton Conference

At the Brighton conference autumn 2014 we were entertained and informed at an amusing workshop presented by the Brighton Improv group 'Maydays'.

 Angela Lansbury (left) with a member of the improv group Maydays, at Toastmasters conference in Brighton, England.

As usual I sat in the front row, hoping to be seen and selected to go on stage. I had with me my latest prop, a talking toy which I had bought the previous day on special offer at Morrisons Supermarket in London.

THE FAKE PANEL OF EXPERTS
One of the Improv sessions involved members of the audience forming a panel of so-called experts who had to comment on a nonsense subject. I think I was supposed to be an expert on trees, talking about tree safety or preservation. You had to be both original and yet not totally absurd, mocking the sort of character you represented, saying the sort of things they would say - but exaggerating more and more.

The rule of three in humour is to say something true, something else true, then something totally untrue which seems to follow from the previous two remarks, or contradict them.

RHYMING ANSWERS TO QUESTIONS
Our next task was to reply in rhyming couplets. As a poet, for me this is easy. My dream is to be a rap singer. My problem is not the rhymes, but singing in tune.

Maydays - the group's name in red on their black polo shirts.

Photo by Angela Lansbury.

THE IMPROV MUSICAL
The finale was the professional group asking members of the audience what they thought of the event - then for a couple of volunteers to tell us about themselves. Any romantic or recently married couples? His name. Her name? Where did you meet? What kind of activity do you share together?

The professional group of four then made a mini-musical about the couple in the audience. They told a story. I can't remember exactly how it went, but my half-remembered version will give you the idea.

First verse from a female member of the cast about the couple - mentioning both their names - sitting in the audience. Then another member creates a chorus couplet - the audience asked to repeat it verbally then sing it.

Then a male member takes over and sings a verse about the man's name and his hobbies. Choruse with the audience.

Then a female member sings about the lady and her hobbies. Chorus with the audience.

Then a man sings about where the couple met. Chorus with the audience.

Then the entire group reprise. Finale - end with chorus. Applause for the couple in the audience. Applause for the group on stage.

I spent several weeks thinking about this and how they did it. I imagined that if they did the same sort of thing at every event, and they were good at rap, it would come naturally.

But, if you don't want to leave things to chance, you can set up the scene.

BOOKS ON IMPROV
I searched on the internet for books on improv singing. I just read a book about improv singing, Instant Songwriting (Subtitle Musical Improv from Dunce to Diva) By Nancy Howland Walker. I've only just started. I recommend it to any imrov performer, songwriter or poet.

It suggests you practise rhymes every day, first thing. I do this anyway. You look around at breakfast. Table, able, Chair, hair. Glass, pass. Spoon, moon. Mat, hat. Fridge, ridge, bridge, midge. Oven, coven. Hob, knob. Clock, dock, rock, sock, lock, block. Door, bore, boar, roar, war, more, oar.

Now we've practised rhyming, some couplets.

I sit down at the table
As soon as I am able,
And pick the highest chair,
and comb my long blonde hair,

Then I pick up my glass,
but don't let this first chance pass,
draw circles with my spoon,
an imaginary moon etc etc

AUDIENCE NAMES
Now let's go back to I m p r o v with the audience. You can plan your questions. You are doing to ask a man and woman their names. If their names are hard to pronounce, change the name to a nickname of your choosing.

Ask their names.
His name is Patel, just as well. If the name is too long, or you can't think of a rhyme, you make a joke, we called him Patrick/Pete.

NAMES & AGES
You can pick English names or nicknames. One for each letter of the alphabet. Write out a rhyme.

Andy - he was handy (played the piano, was a builder, DIY enthusiast, an accountant, banker)
Adele - she looked swell
Barry wanted to marry, A cute little girl called Carrie, but she was in love with Harry, so she would not tarry ...
Brian, Brian/ John/Jon, is a man you can rely on.
Dave always wanted to be brave, he did not want to be a slave, he looked for someone he could save, , went to a rave but ended in a grave
Joan was always on the phone, she liked to have a good old moan, and did not want to be alone, and twenty cats filled up her home
Jim / Tim always looks so grim, you wonder what's wrong with him
Mary is scary, and often contrary, you'd better be wary, her brother is a fairy ...
Patrick - that was his hat trick.
Pete - gives a smile when we meet.
Petula - was his junior (if she is younger)
Suzie is a floozie, gets boozy and then woozy. She won the lottery, went on a cruise ee. I thought how lovely that would be, and I wished she'd taken me to sea, that would be fun you must agree, to see the world with Suzie.
Yves - you won't believe, keeps three aces up his sleeve, don't play cards or you will grieve
Zoe - hair/skirt/poems long and flowy

AGES
Find a rhyme for each decade
teenage - early stage
over twenty one - their married life has hardly begun
over thirty - he looked shirty
Forty plus - one of us
He's fifty - did you say fifty?  yes I said fifty - that's why he's so thrifty, that's why he's so nifty, it's great to be fifty!
Fifty two - just like you
Fifty three - just like me
Fifty four - still on the dance floor
fifty five - we'll survive
fifty six - and knows some tricks
fifty seven - half way to heaven
fifty eight - never late/always late
fifty nine - she's on time - will you be mine - no she's Patrick's
sixty - drinks coffee not tea, drinks decaff tea
Retired - came here to get inspired
age uncertain - draw the curtain
She won't say - anything but 'go away'

If you practise this two or three times with a group of three or four of you, taking names drawn from a hat, you can soon develop a routine. You would soon improve if you did this on a regular basis for a living. Imagine doing three shows a week, or, like the magician who performed for our Writers' group at Christmas, in season three a day.  You'd find you soon improve your improv, with foresight, hindsight, heckling incorporated, and inspiration of the moment - remembered and repeated.


Angela Lansbury is a speaker, comic poet, tutor, trainer, and aspiring songwriter, on blogger.com, YouTube, LinkedIn, Facebook; author of ten books including Wedding Speeches & Toasts; Etiquette For Every Occasion (from libraries); Quick Quotations; Who Said What When; (Quotations Calendar in preparation; sold by Lulu.com - or direct from the author to get a signed copy.